Stories

I used to think that just because every story must have a beginning, a middle and an end that those were the most vital parts. Because of this, throughout high-school and until very recently I have focused my writing so much on the plot and was never satisfied with a single piece of work.

I could make a bonfire with only the paper I’ve wasted writing bullshit. I tried everything: talking to staff relatives and friends , researching everywhere I could, nothing worked… I still wrote bs. Every English class spent listening to my teachers drone on about theme and structure and whatever else and I never listened. They were trying to teach me the techniques I NEEDED to be working into my writing but I thought it was just gibberish.

The day I realized what everyone always tried to tell me by saying “the plot isn’t important” is that THE PLOT IS IMPORTANT but it’s not where you should START. The plot is the tool you use to say something. Decide what you want to SAY , what STORY you want to tell to your READER. Then pick or create a plot line that says this and work in your techniques. 🙂

Happy writing!

Help

My friend Scott, 20 , died from cancer on boxing day

http://www.jrfm.com/kristen-jade/2014/12/27/heaven-gained-an-angel-#sthash.JSDihv0P.gbpl

The first time I met Scott was in grade eleven and I thought he was a guardian angel. He wasn’t just kind, he was empathetic and he acted on his empathy. The amazing thing was the more people I talked to the more I realized that everyone thought of Scott as their guardian angel. There was this one time…
I was at a house party that year, standing alone with a heavy and terrified soul. In that moment of melancholy, came (out of thin air) this towering but always smiling guy. He yelled hello and cheers and then before I knew it lifted me up and threw me around in the air . He made me truly laugh and that was hard to do back then. The funniest part though: I was laughing so hard I started flailing and head butted the ceiling with my skull! With wide eyes and concerned lips Scott immediately grounded me and it seemed he had utter tunnel vision for one moment as he asked if I was okay.

We who knew him know that of all the people to get cancer Scott was the most undeserving. That’s the hardest part. Fuck cancer. It took the most important person from the world. All I want to do is yell and dwell, but then cancer would win. And in my heart Scott was always a winner. Not because of his sports or school, although he was also that type of winner. But because of the way he lived his life. He LIVED , and he didn’t just live for him but for everyone else too. If he was with me now I know he would put his arm around me in a brotherly way and say something like “Hey , what’d you expect , it was karma for hitting your head on the ceiling” So in his honour I will let go of my anger and promise not to dwell on the whys of it all.

To Scott’s family : I am sincerely sorry for your incredible loss and I wish you the best in your recovery.

I’ll never forget you Scott “it’s not a” Trapp. Farewell. I’m sure it’s paradise where you are. Go spread your wings, you’ll be as wonderful an angel as you were a man.

https://allout.org/en/

Could you please become an All Out sustainer, or at least join the mailing list so you can sign petitions?

These are snippets from the email I just received from one of the twelve people who run the amazing organization “All Out”

“Dear Alice,
Sometimes simple actions unexpectedly lead to our proudest moments.
I definitely had no idea that chipping in a few hours a few years ago would lead me to you and the big, crazy dream of All Out.
By signing, sharing and donating, you’re winning stunning victories for love to help real people. You’re helping Xiao Zhen fight gay ‘cures’ in China. You’re stopping the UK from sending lesbians like Aderonke back to danger in Nigeria.”

These people really do care. Those “stunning victories” she mentions are petitions I personally care a lot about and signed.

”
Making a monthly donation is an incredibly powerful action. Already there are 1,830 All Out members signed up as sustainers, creating the core funding All Out relies on every month to run our campaigns and plan ahead. Sustainers all have a few things in common. If this sounds like you, consider signing up too:

You’re global in your compassion: you want to help people, even if they’re halfway around the world, because you think no one should have to live in fear just because of who they love.

You’re forward-thinking and proactive: you don’t just wait for an emergency to help out. You’re committed to building a strong, resourced movement that’s ready to stop new anti-gay laws or violent attacks on lesbian, gay, bi and trans people before they happen.

You’re able to step up for those who can’t: you know that All Out members come from every country in the world – from Russia, to Uganda, to Brazil to Japan to France and beyond – and from every walk of life. That means that for many, it’s financially impossible or even dangerous to donate to support equality. But you see many helping out in other ways and you’re ready to donate in their place.

You know a bargain when you see one: you know that saving someone’s life or keeping a loving family together is worth a few dollars, Euros or pounds each month – and that when you donate to All Out, the tiny staff team and hugely powerful tools are able to make each cent go a long way.

If you can, please become an All Out sustainer before December 31: go.allout.org/en/a/2015

Thank you for being a part of this big crazy dream.

Andre Banks,
Executive Director
”

”
P.S. Just in case you’re mulling it over, here’s 8 more reasons to become an All Out sustainer:

Reason 1 – What we do works
All Out helps us make action count. The office team brings all 2.1 million of us the latest news on what’s happening around the world. We consult local activists and experts, then plan the quickest, best ways we can all join in to help change things. Lots of us subscribe to great internet services like Spotify and Netflix for a few dollars, pounds or euros a month. Become an All Out sustainer – give a small, regular donation for love and equality.

“I love the fact that All Out is standing up for LGBT rights everywhere.” – Amer, All Out member in Lebanon

Reason 2 – What we’re building is beautiful and world-changing
All Out is much more than just an online platform. We’re building a huge and powerful community that fights to change a world where people are locked up for who they love, or are frightened to go on a date because thugs could be waiting. Our growing power comes from all of us working together. That’s the only way to build the world we want to see. Click to donate.

“The thing I love about All Out is that together we can make a difference and make other people realize everyone deserves to love and to be loved, no matter what sexual orientation they are.” – Natalia, Poland

Reason 3 – We’re fiscally responsible and audited annually
We know that making a donation is an act of hope and trust. Every member of the All Out team is personally committed to making every donation go as far as it can, every single penny used for good. For extra reassurance, All Out is audited annually to ensure we meet our obligations as a US-registered non-profit. And every year we’ve returned a clean financial bill of health.

Reason 4 – An All Out donation is an investment with permanent returns for love and equality
Donations to All Out fund high impact campaigns that also bring in more people as All Out members. More people mean more donations, and more impact. So your donation doesn’t just help one campaign or action, it helps grow an ever-expanding community that will multiply your donation many times over. Click here to become an All Out sustainer

“I love All Out because I’m finally feeling normal and that we’re all the same. It’s good to know that I’m not alone!” Sima, All Out member in Iran

Reason 5 – We have an outstanding, super-dedicated team
It’s not easy to do campaigning and social change effectively. It takes real brains, guts and the ability to listen as well as talk. Everyone on the global All Out team is there because they are proven, outstanding campaigners. They’ve started businesses, worked in the public and private sectors, and have an impressive track record of key victories standing up for other causes like the environment, women’s rights and racial justice.

Reason 6 – All Out is extraordinary value for money
We keep our costs super low so that we can maximize the impact of every donation. We know that every penny counts, so we keep our team and overhead as low as we possibly can. We rent desks from other organisations, so there’s no million-dollar building or fancy perks, and there are no layers of bureaucracy to eat up resources.

Make a small monthly donation before December 31.

Reason 7 – There’s no other organisation like All Out
All Out is unique in what we’re trying to do and how we’re trying to do it. We want to build a world where no one has to sacrifice their family or freedom because of who they are or who they love. We’re harnessing the collective power of millions to do it: our time, our ideas, a few of our dollars, our belief in the power of people and love to overcome hatred and fear.

“You ARE love. You’re working towards the right to love anyone and to be equal – it shouldn’t matter where anyone’s from. And I have a feeling all of you have huge hearts. Love you guys.” Anna, Sweden

Reason 8 – We’ve achieved a lot together and we want to do twice as much in 2015

How we got the IOC to change the rules in 2013 and 2014:

We teamed up with brave activists in Russia, and collaborated with partners like Athlete Ally and Human Rights Watch to run the smartest, biggest campaign possible.
More than 50 of us delivered a 300,000 strong petition to the International Olympic Committee (IOC). For the first time in its history, the IOC publicly stated that Principle 6 in the Olympic charter prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation. We got 50 Olympic champions to join our Principle 6 campaign to say no to homophobia.
To get the message global, All Out members and people everywhere showed support by buying Principle 6 gear created by American Apparel. Celebrities like Rihanna, Mark Ruffalo, and Zachary Quinto wore P6 gear on social media. Love and equality became the name of the Games.
More than 150,000 All Out members emailed Coca-Cola’s CEO urging the company to denounce the anti-gay laws. We also funded massive billboards on wheels to swarm Coca-Cola HQ with a powerful message: “Coca-Cola, speak out now.” We whipped up a media storm : we didn’t get Coca-Cola to move but three National Olympic sponsors publicly denounced the anti-gay laws.
The language of our campaigns was used in major media outlets and was even adopted by people like UK Prime Minister David Cameron and UN Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon during his opening remarks at the Sochi Olympics.
In September this year, the IOC announced that Principle 6 of the Olympic Charter prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation. Last week, they voted to include ‘sexual orientation’ in the charter, explicitly granting protection to all lesbian, gay and bisexual athletes
“Organisations like All Out help to fight for the important issues. Without projects like these, the issues wouldn’t get enough necessary attention. Without them, things would very likely get progressively worse, and that must not happen. All Out fights. That’s what I love about it.” – Olga All Out member in Russia

Other amazing things we did:

March 2014: ‘Red Pepper’ is a Ugandan tabloid famous for ‘outing’ gay, lesbian and trans people. When we realised that French telecoms giant Orange was buying ads from them, we took action. 80,000 of us signed a petition asking them to pull their advertising from the paper – and we won! They agreed to stop their contract.
April 2014: Aderonke was arrested, tortured, and sentenced to death in Nigeria when it was discovered she was a lesbian. She fled to safety in the UK, but she went through a humiliating interrogation by UK officials who didn’t believe her. More than 230,000 of us created a massive outcry to convince the Home Office to halt these unfair deportations until their process is inclusive for gay, lesbian and trans asylum seekers. Aderonke is still in the UK, fighting for all asylum-seekers.
May 2014: Do you remember Lou Engle? He’s an a scary anti-gay religious leader: he even supported Uganda’s brutal ‘Kill the Gays’ bill. So when he tried to go to Geneva, Switzerland on a tour to raise support for his anti-gay campaign, 70 000 of us spoke out. The Mayor of Geneva joined the mobilization and the conference that was hosting him dropped him. We won!
June 2014: 7,000 of us signed an urgent petition to Paraguay’s President urging him to sign an OAS resolution that would help protect gay, lesbian, bi and trans people. Our partners in Paraguay, SOMOSGAY, organised a street protest that was violently attacked by the police, catching huge media attention. We delivered our signatures just before the vote – and won! The President announced he would sign the resolution.
July 2014: After Uganda’s anti-gay law was struck down, we helped the Ugandans celebrate – big time! We secretly helped fund a big and beautiful pride parade. Then, almost 3,000 of us chipped in to fund a tabloid in Uganda, that’s being distributed around the country, telling the real, inspiring, and heartbreaking stories of the lesbian, gay, bi and trans people who live there – or have fled.
October 2014: When an anti-gay group called ‘La Manif Pour Tous’ started attacking families in France, All Out members showed up. 260,000 of us signed a petition asking politicians to denounce their views. Hundreds of us came together in a huge family reunion, showing our love was stronger.
November 2014: Officials in Buenos Aires were threatening that they would not provide security for the city’s Pride Parade. But after more than 10,000 of us came together and signed a petition, city officials decided to provide security and safety for this important event.
This is what we can do when we join together. Click here to support this movement and make 2015 even better. Become an All Out sustainer by December 31 at midnight.
”
Love a concerned global citizen

So You Want to Be a Storyteller?

Writers and Artists

“You writers and artists poop out and get all mixed up, and somebody has to come in and straighten you out.’ He shrugged his shoulders. ‘You seem to take things so personally, hating people and worshipping them – always thinking people are so important – especially yourselves. You just ask to be kicked around. I like people and I like them to like me, but I wear my heart where God put it – on the inside.”

– F. Scott Fitzgerald , The Last Tycoon

Happy National Poetry Month… From a Habitual Procrastinator

It’s the end of National Poetry Month and I finally got my act together to create one silly, poorly written poem.

The Knickknack Poem by Chantelle

There once was a girl with a spider web for a mind.
A democrat, a dreamer, a simple peasant kind.
This same befuddled girl, just trying to find her place,
Was searching for the answers and how to win this race.
There once was a girl who was in love with pretty things,
Sea shells, Mulberry bags, even guitar strings.
No matter what the item was she could not seem to let it go,
Every little trinket had a place inside her home.

She’d collected all these knickknacks,
The ones she’d bought and ones she’d found.
She kept every single article,
All the gifts she’d gotten from around.
Hidden in every crack and corner
Was another Jimmy Choo or costume ring.
She tried to fill the hole inside her with superficial things.

But her most precious item was kept inside her chest,
Hidden behind white cages and a barrier of flesh.
It was one knickknack that she owned,
She would never share with the rest.
She kept it closed off, safe, and secret,
Never to be seen.
Never to be stolen or looked upon with greed.
Afraid if it was even burrowed,
It would get broken or misplaced
For she’d lent it out before,
And everything blew up in her face.

Remembering Kurt

Twenty years ago, I could not yet hold up my head on my own, but was still rocked by Kurt Cobain’s death. Not, of course, because I cared (at the time) about him or his music, but rather because my infant heart could not help but feel the pain of my father. He loved Kurt, even if he didn’t particularly love Nirvana. At that time my dear old dad was still a young rebel rocker, an avid worshipper of Zeppelin & The Doors. It is from my father that I later acquired my intense passion for the Jehovah of music and to this day we share that love, but back then he was consumed by it, lived every moment in the name of rock. I have a blurry memory in my soul of my rough and tough papa after hearing the news: as his knees buckled, grasping the shirt sleeve of his vneck-to-the-belly-button-chest-hair-erupting-even-in-the-90’s-wearing-best-friend. To my dad, the death of one of his favourite musicians was equal to the death of a dear friend. This is why I remember the day, because it was felt so intensely and so significantly in my family, that it is as much part of my childhood as the day I learned to walk.

It is in honour of this bitter anniversary that I share the following lyrics about the “27 club” by a fellow singer/song-writer:

28 by John Craigie

Jim Morrison, Miami County Prison,
lookin’ out the window at the barbed wire fence
Singing ‘This ain’t for me, this rock and roll scene.
I should be writing poetry on a farm out in France.

‘Cause I can’t see through the darkness. I can’t feel no pain.
Seems you lose your spark when you achieve your fame.
I could start it all over, I could escape.
If I could only make it to 28
If I could only make it to 28.’

Janis Joplin, one foot in the coffin.
Left that field a-rockin’ and she walked on out the door.
She put her head in her hands, she said ‘I’ve given all I can.
I drain myself for these fans. I ain’t never been this dry before.

‘But Imma move out of this Chelsea Hotel, stop drinking all the time.
Stop blowin’ Leonard Cohen and listening to him whine.
Cause I know I am beautiful, I will prove it someday.
If could only make it to 28.
If I could only make it to 28.’

And Kurt Cobain sat in his shirt in the rain,
stomach full of pain, eyes growin’ dark.
He said ‘I’m losing control. Oughta move down to San Francisco,
light candles at all of my shows and switch to acoustic guitars.

‘Cause this world don’t need no more tension and hate.
Needs a reason for these kids to stand up and create.
And I could pull this trigger, or I could just walk away,
if I could only make it to 28.
If I could only make it.’

The Ten Commandments (Book Lovers Edition)

The Ten Commandments (Book Lovers Edition).

Pretty by Katie Makkai

Katie Makkai “Pretty”

When I was just a little girl, I asked my mother, “What will I be? Will I be pretty? Will I be pretty? Will I be pretty? What comes next? Oh right, will I be rich?” Which is almost pretty depending on where you shop. And the pretty question infects from conception, passing blood and breath into cells. The word hangs from our mothers’ hearts in a shrill fluorescent floodlight of worry.

“Will I be wanted? Worthy? Pretty?” But puberty left me this funhouse mirror dryad: teeth set at science fiction angles, crooked nose, face donkey-long and pox-marked where the hormones went finger-painting. My poor mother.

“How could this happen? You’ll have porcelain skin as soon as we can see a dermatologist. You sucked your thumb. That’s why your teeth look like that! You were hit in the face with a Frisbee when you were 6. Otherwise your nose would have been just fine!

“Don’t worry. We’ll get it fixed!” She would say, grasping my face, twisting it this way and that, as if it were a cabbage she might buy.

But this is not about her. Not her fault. She, too, was raised to believe the greatest asset she could bestow upon her awkward little girl was a marketable facade. By 16, I was pickled with ointments, medications, peroxides. Teeth corralled into steel prongs. Laying in a hospital bed, face packed with gauze, cushioning the brand new nose the surgeon had carved.

Belly gorged on 2 pints of my blood I had swallowed under anesthesia, and every convulsive twist of my gut like my body screaming at me from the inside out, “What did you let them do to you!”

All the while this never-ending chorus droning on and on, like the IV needle dripping liquid beauty into my blood. “Will I be pretty? Will I be pretty? Like my mother, unwrapping the gift wrap to reveal the bouquet of daughter her $10,000 bought her? Pretty? Pretty.”

And now, I have not seen my own face for 10 years. I have not seen my own face in 10 years, but this is not about me.

About men wallowing on bar stools, drearily practicing attraction and everyone who will drift home tonight, crest-fallen because not enough strangers found you suitably fuckable.

This, this is about my own some-day daughter. When you approach me, already stung-stayed with insecurity, begging, “Mom, will I be pretty? Will I be pretty?” I will wipe that question from your mouth like cheap lipstick and answer, “No! The word pretty is unworthy of everything you will be, and no child of mine will be contained in five letters.

“You will be pretty intelligent, pretty creative, pretty amazing. But you, will never be merely ‘pretty’.”